Colleen's Search for the Loch Ness Monster

**Discussion begins at 3:00**

Today, we’re going to discuss the legend of the Loch Ness Monster... For nearly a century, stories of a massive, elusive creature lurking in the deep, dark waters of Scotland’s Loch Ness have fascinated believers, skeptics, and adventurers alike. From grainy photographs to sonar scans, the monster—affectionately known as “Nessie”—has become a cultural icon.  Is it possible that Nessie could be a living relic from the age of dinosaurs?  Are we merely fascinated with the unknown?   Whether you’re a firm believer, a curious skeptic, or just here for the mystery, join us as we take a journey into the misty Highlands to uncover the truth—or the myth—behind the monster of Loch Ness.

Transcript

Hi, good day.

No, wait, that's Australian.

Hi.

Let's welcome Colleen back from Scotland.

Scotland.

And her deep dive into the Loch Ness Monster.

That's right.

What have you been up to, Colleen?

I literally was in Scotland for 10 days, nine nights.

It was lovely.

And I did go searching for the Loch Ness Monster.

Did not find it.

There is a reward if you do find it.

I think it's like $4,000.

$4,000?

Maybe.

That's not enough.

There's definitely a reward for it, but I can't remember what the amount was.

The rewards are anything from...

What is it, $4,000?

$25,000 to a million.

Anyways, 10 percent.

So is it time for our drink check?

Yeah, drink check.

So we have finally answered the question.

Does Colleen like martinis?

Yes.

Colleen has been adamant.

When we go out, she's like, I really just want to be a classy girl drinking a martini.

And, you know, guys.

Well, I was like, I don't think Colleen, you're going to like this.

And then as we've talked about it, I've been like, I don't know, maybe she's going to prove me wrong.

You understand my love for olive.

I liked it, but the verdict was.

I mean, I didn't hate it.

I finished it.

So take that.

Yeah.

But I think I would have liked it maybe over ice, but I want it with ice, maybe.

I think I just don't like drinking plain alcohol.

Yeah.

And I told you that's pretty much what a martini is.

Yeah, but it wasn't bad.

No.

And we added some bitters and you said it definitely was.

It tasted better with bitters, yeah.

And I had six olives with it.

So.

Yeah.

And then she was like, just keep putting more olives.

Yeah.

I like every sip I had an olive in my mouth.

I would drink it again if you made it.

I don't think I would pay money for it.

All right.

Well, there we go.

Question answered.

Check.

Check the reel for my live reaction.

So let's get into it then, Colleen.

I can't wait to hear what you learned.

This is all about the Loch Ness monster.

Okay.

So this, I'll give my personal background before I read my intro.

Erin, my sister.

She's one of our most vocal supporters.

Yeah.

She's one of our number one fans.

Erin and I went to Scotland for 10 days.

And we have our trip spent in the Highlands in Inverness, which is the city of the Highlands, where it connects to River Ness, which connects to Loch Ness.

Okay.

I like how you say it.

And you have to say it, Loch.

Okay.

And like when we were on the boat tour, I feel like this guy needed to cough the whole time.

Because he was like, oh, Ness.

Is Inverness where Outlander is?

The first episode and parts of season one are in Inverness.

She crosses through the rocks.

Yeah.

And actually we went to the stones that inspired her.

The stones in the show are fake, but we went to one of the stones that inspired the author.

Did you take a picture?

I did.

Yeah.

They were actually really cool.

Those stones were prehistoric, so that was kind of sick.

That might be another conspiracy.

So I'm really trying to do a Scottish accent.

I think you sound so good.

Yeah.

But the entire trip, besides the boat tour guy, we only talk to British people.

For nearly a century, stories of a massive elusive creature lurking in the deep dark waters of Scotland's Loch Ness have fascinated believers, skeptics, and adventurers alike.

From grainy photographs to a sonar scan, the monster, affectionately known as Nessie, not to confuse you with Bella Swan and Edward Cullen's daughter, Nessie, Thank you for that.

has become a cultural icon, hashtag diva.

Is it possible that Nessie could be a living relic from the age of the dinosaurs?

Are we merely fascinated with the unknown?

Whether you're a firm believer, a curious skeptic, or just here for the mystery, join us as we take a journey into the misty Highlands to uncover the truth or the myth behind the Loch Ness Monster.

That was great.

We're having our annual Murder Mystery Party this weekend, and I feel like...

Oh, I'm so excited.

I feel like you're just getting your thespian skills warmed up.

This weekend, I'll be a hippie, and my name is going to be Jay, and I'm married.

I'm married.

To Kait.

Yeah, to Kait.

Okay, so this is all about Loch Ness, also known as Loch Ness, Nessie.

Loch Ness means lake, ness, so loch means lake.

I also learned that there's a place called Loch Lockay, which is Lake Lakey, which I really wanted to go to that one too.

This is the conspiracy behind the large, long necked with multiple humps, dinosaur like monster.

I was reading through all of the sightings.

There are just hundreds of sightings.

So I picked the more famous ones with the more interesting background.

But the origin of the monster started all the way back in the 7th century AD.

Wow.

Yeah.

It was a religious story.

This comes from the story or biography called Life of St.

Columba, who was an Irish monk staying on the land of the Pics, which is along the river of Loch Ness, a river Ness.

River Ness flows into Loch Ness.

And he was with his companions when he encountered a burial ceremony, a long river Ness of a man locals claimed was attacked by the water beast.

In response to hearing of this man's death, St.

Columba sent a disciple whose name I cannot pronounce, so we're just going to call him the disciple, to swim across the river.

So he essentially was like, okay, sacrifice yourself and swim.

And so the man went into the water and swam across the river when the beast approached and tried to pull him under the water.

As the beast attacked the man, St.

Columba made the sign of the cross and said, go no further, do not touch the man, go back at once.

And the monster released him and disappeared.

Are there eels in the...?

I'm so glad you mentioned that.

I will.

I do have a section where I'm going to talk about other possible animals this monster could be, and eels is number one.

Okay.

So are there any octopuses in this area?

Probably not, right?

I don't know if I can confirm nor deny, but it is fresh water.

Loch Ness, actually, what we learned on the boat tour is, has its own temperature regulation.

So it has, I can not remember the exact temperature, but it stays the same temperature all year round because of how deep it is.

And another fun fact that I learned is that if Loch Ness was empty, it would take every source of water in the entire UK to refill it because of how much water it takes.

It sounds like it's probably as impressive as Lake Bacall.

Yeah.

Yeah, no, you are right.

I guess we're talking about a lake here.

It's freshwater, so I would guess octopuses would not be living there.

It's freshwater, but I think it has along the river, it's brackish.

Like it does have resources.

Octopuses, octopi.

I don't believe they're saltwater creatures.

Yeah.

Okay.

I do think now it has access to the ocean because of canals.

But at this point, it was a lake without canals.

Okay.

So he was not grabbed by an octopus with eight legs.

Correct.

Yeah.

How about a dolphin?

There was an option to go swimming with the dolphins in Scotland.

In Loch Ness?

No, along the coast.

Certainly, there's no dolphins.

But I was shocked to see that you could do that in Scotland.

Yeah, I wouldn't think so.

They're a different breed of dolphins though.

Yeah, I wouldn't picture that as my dolphin.

I'm just thinking of all of the animals we've talked about that could potentially grab you, but really eel is probably the only one.

And that's kind of where my theory goes.

All right, we'll get to that.

Keep going.

Some historians have researched the story of St.

Columba, and they hypothesized that he had been pulling inspiration from, like, myths of Kelpies.

And also, it was a very popular theme in that era to use water beasts and water monsters as, like, a way to teach lessons about religion and stuff like that.

So a lot of historians agree that this is not a real story and just inspired by...

So we were talking to Kait on our way here, and she was like, well, let me tell you what my theory is.

My theory is that there's this interdimensional portal.

And when I looked this up, it goes back to what you're saying.

So her theory is that the reason that the Loch Ness monster seems to be so hard to find is because it's slipping in and out of our world through this interdimensional portal, which is located in the loch.

Sometimes people connect this to, oh, it's UFO related, or there's some paranormal activity.

And again, the Loch Ness is just this window between dimensions, this thin spot.

Oh, I could believe it.

But I guess this also comes from the fact that there is all this Celtic folklore that I think you're talking about that makes water like a mystical place.

People associate water with mysticism.

And so that can be like the link between the human world and like the unnatural world.

And so again, it sounds like this theory about this interdimensional portal might have something to do with like the USOs we keep talking about around water.

But it also might have something to do with all of this folklore that you're talking about, like the Kelpies, which are like shape shifting water spirits that apparently live in water.

And so maybe they're coming in and out through these dimensions.

Yeah.

Oh.

Also, are we shocked that that's what Kait's theory is?

No, and I actually, you know what?

Loki, I can believe it.

Every time you say Loki, I'm like, Loki?

It always goes back to Marvel.

Honestly, like when you're there on the lake and like driving around it, it really does feel magical.

Like the mountains just surround you.

The air has a different smell.

Like it's just, I don't know.

I can believe it's magical, Loki.

Jealous.

Yeah.

I'm like, the water is just so dark.

Okay, so that was the first original story of the monster.

And then I kind of have it break down into like the 1800s and the 1900s.

The next like more popular story comes in the 1870s when somebody by the name of D.

Mackenzie of Balmain, the Mackenzie Clan, he allegedly witnessed Nessie in 1871, but he did not publish his story till 1930s, which is when all the other more popular sightings also occurred.

So it just makes me think like, did he actually see the monster or is he just like going along with the trend, going along with the fad, if you will?

There was a sighting by Mackenzie MacDonald, who described a salamander-like beast that was 50 meters long and seen from off the coast.

Well, now we know a meter is pretty close to a yard.

Thanks for that, Kait.

So the next major story came from Aldi Mackay.

Mackay.

Mackay in 1933.

This was published in the Inverness Courier, which was an art local newspaper, about the large whale-like beast.

And they said, the creature disported itself, rolling and plunging for a fully a minute, its body resembling that of a whale, and the water cascading and churning like a simmery cauldron.

Soon, however, it disappeared in a boiling mass of foam.

Both onlookers confess that there was something uncanny about the whole thing, for they realized that here was no ordinary denizen of the depths, because apart from its enormous size, the beast, in taking the final plunge, sent waves that were big enough to have been caused by a passing steamer.

So just like a big old monster.

Yeah.

Like a big old thing.

Creepy.

George Spicer in 1933 also took note of seeing a large body with a wavy long neck, no limbs.

He described it as similar to a dragon or prehistoric animal that I have ever seen in my life.

And having a long neck which moved up and down in the manner of a scenic railway.

It had an animal in its mouth and a body that was fairly big with a high back.

But if there were any feet, they must have been web kind.

And as for a tail, I cannot say.

As it moved so rapidly, when we got to the spot, it had disappeared into the loch.

So like a serpent-like creature that eats animals.

That's what I'm hearing, carnivore.

Well, I mean, I always thought when you see the picture, it's like a brontosaurus.

I always saw a dinosaur too when I saw it.

I'm like, oh, easy clap, a dinosaur.

The first image made famous was also from 1933 in November of 1933 by Hugh Gray.

But the most famous image, the one that you look up, that grainy black and white one, is called the surgeon's photograph.

Have you heard of this one?

I mean, I know what picture you're talking about.

The surgeon's photograph?

So this photograph, I think it's coined that because it was a picture by Robert Kenneth Wilson who was a gynecologist, which made me laugh.

I'm like, the gynecologist is finding monsters in the Loch, something about that.

He was a London gyno, and he is coined for having taken the most famous picture of the Loch Ness, which I just said.

However.

You're going to debunk it?

Yeah.

After a couple years, I think it was in the 90s, they completely debunked his photograph.

Scientists took apart the image piece by piece, and noted that it looked like they had like layered negative.

And if you look at the original print of the picture, you can see like a rope or something that is pulling the monster.

And also the way the water pattern is in the picture makes it look like, according to the scientists, that it's shallow water, not in the middle of the loch, which he claimed it was.

And so he ended up admitting to it, the whole thing is a hoax.

He had a monster figurine made that him and his friends dunked in the water and snapped a picture.

How embarrassing.

I know.

And that's like the most famous picture.

Apparently, he was a prankster.

And so he just committed to the bit.

So I mean, as I learned more and more of the sightings, the more I'm like, and when you're on your boat, you didn't see anything.

So when we were on the boat, so the boat tour started in the river Ness, and then we sailed through the river.

It was really, it was like less than an hour.

Like the loch is huge, but there's like nothing on it.

We sailed through the river and then did a tour of the loch.

So there's a section where you leave the river and enter the loch.

And it has like a giant tree stump coming out of it.

Now this tree stump is clearly not old enough to have, maybe the 1800s, but like not old enough to be 780s.

780, but it does look like a monster neck.

So like, I could give you that.

And then when we were on the boat tour itself, the tour guide was like, yeah, even last week, somebody claimed they saw the monster.

So like, it's still...

But didn't you also say that all the locals were like...

Oh yeah, we did a bus tour and the tour guide, who was British, I loved him though, was like, it's been hundreds to thousands of years since this monster was first seen and we've never captured it.

So like, he was like, we would have caught it by now.

He sounded a little country when he said that, huh?

Yeah, he was British actually.

So I don't know, being in Scotland actually made me a disbeliever because they're all like...

And it's also a huge tourist trap.

You did a boat tour.

Yeah, well, the boat tour was a historical boat tour, but they just talked about Nessie.

You said there was a Nessie hunting.

There was called the Nessie hunter.

He was sold out, couldn't get him, but...

Instead, you had to go learn about history.

Yeah, and said we did a historical tour.

It was called the Jacobite Cruise, which I learned all about the Jacobites.

Do you know about the Jacobites?

Yeah, because I watched Outlander.

Yeah, I had no idea about Scotland's history, actually.

This was a very educating tour trip.

Our listeners are like, thank God they're getting some history lessons.

Well, like I told Erin, I was like, we're going to Scotland.

There's mostly historical things to see, because we've been on family vacations where we do historical things, and sometimes that's boring.

I find it interesting, but my other cousins sometimes find it boring.

So I warned her, I was like, we are touring historical things, because we literally toured the battlefield of the Culloden battle.

Culloden?

Culloden.

I think it's Culloden, though.

I think that's how they went on.

But that's where the clans all died, pretty much, and that was the end of the clan.

So I learned a lot.

Okay, but what are the other possible options?

Yeah, let's hear it.

Number one, eels.

The European eel is proven to live in the Loch.

The European eel, we've talked a lot about them.

So fact, they live in the Loch.

To this day, they can be found there.

How big did we say they could get?

Not very big.

But what if it's just a really big one?

Big enough to pull someone underwater?

Probably not.

Also, eels move the way snakes do, side to side.

And they claim Nessie moves up and down.

So, but I'm still thinking eels and I'm thinking alien eels, portals.

I'm like hands down, probably an eel.

The other option...

You're like, I don't believe, but if I do believe, it's an eel.

It's an eel, yeah.

The other option made me laugh.

People truly believe it was an elephant.

An elephant living in the Loch Ness.

So apparently there was a lot of traveling circuses in the 1900s.

And they claim that the circuses were letting the elephants drink and bathe in the loch.

And so like they claim Nessie had like a long trunk-like neck.

So somebody was like, what if that was an elephant in the water?

I mean, it sounds ridiculous, but did you know that elephants are exceptional swimmers?

Yes.

And they snorkel, they use their trunk as a snorkel?

Yeah.

So I'm like, wait, that's kind of insane.

But they can't be living in the water.

No, but like all it takes is one person to see it.

Oh, you think that they were letting the elephant swim, someone saw it, and everyone's like, that's the Loch Ness monster.

Like, I think we had the known Celtic myth stories, and then somebody saw an elephant in the water.

Okay.

That's one option.

Yeah, I mean, it does sound like there were probably these fairy tales.

And then, yeah, maybe someone saw an eel one time, maybe someone saw an elephant one time, maybe someone saw a tree stump one time, and they're all just making it fit into the story they've heard.

And when you're there, it's like you want to find it.

So it's like, you will look for what you want, right?

So another option was called the Greenland shark, which I looked it up.

Well, you can look it up on your computer screen.

It looks like a fish.

Oh, this is just like when we were talking about Lake Bacall and all these potential theories, and I was like, how is this fish supposed to be mistaken?

Anybody, yeah.

There's no way that looks like a literal fish, and they're kind of small.

So immediately, I was like, no.

Another more likely option is a really big wave.

I mean, I guess they, I'm sorry, I guess looking at the Greenland shark though.

Maybe I didn't look at enough pictures.

I mean, it looks like a fish.

It looks not exciting.

It doesn't have a neck.

It is 21 feet long.

But it doesn't have a neck.

And it does weigh over 1,000 kilos.

So I guess I'm thinking like, okay, if you're just seeing something long in the water.

I'll give you that.

21 feet.

But yes, but up close, I mean, it looks like a fish.

Like the water is dark.

Also, the water is brown, not clear.

There's some type of mineral in the water that makes the water brown.

It's perfectly fine to drink, but like it's murky.

Were you drinking the brown water?

Yeah.

If you drink the tap water, it was brown, but it's perfectly fine to drink.

So I could see how it would be hard to identify things in the water.

The other option is that the monster could have just been water.

So because of the location of the loch in between mountains, there gets to be like gusts of wind, and they will experience what's called standing waves.

So it's like when the wave comes up in curves, and so people theorize that from a distance, you can see a standing wave and it looks like a curved neck.

That feels like a stretch.

But then I'm also thinking about sometimes when you're looking out at the ocean, you're not often, or was that just a wave?

Yeah.

Like, and what if it was evening time?

Also it rains all the time in Scotland, so I'm thinking like rainy weather, wind.

You said it's very misty.

Very misty.

So also, you know what I just realized is one thing about this?

How long have we been wearing glasses for, like humans?

Because like, what about people who had poor vision?

Yeah, but maybe people didn't have as bad a vision then because we didn't have like phones, screens, I don't know.

When we talked about USOs and we talked about Columbus sighting aliens, and then we talked about mermaids too, I think it's kind of a similar thing.

We were like, how much of this is people?

Can you imagine being on a body of water at night?

It's not like now we're in flight, just pitch black.

Pitch black.

You're on a boat, on top of that, if you're like dehydrated or anything, and then you just see something.

And yeah, so we have poor vision, it's dark, you've probably been awake.

Yeah, you're scared.

And malnourished, and you could make, you could see something and make that anything.

Yeah.

And I'm gullible.

We know.

I mean, I was out there, I was literally looking.

Like it's like we say, if Colleen doesn't believe it, it's not real.

You didn't try hard enough.

Yeah.

I wanted to believe, like I wanted to find it, I wanted to believe it.

But like the more you hear about the stories, I'm like every sighting just sounds like somebody trying too hard.

And I'm like, I just stopped believing.

End of innocence.

Yeah.

But I mean like, but then I say this and then watch like tomorrow, they find it.

Like you said, if they haven't found it for thousands of years.

That's the other part of it.

I mean, well, so also when I was reading the early, early sightings compared to like the more modern day sightings, I, a part of me thinks it was real and it did exist.

But prior to the Internet, somebody killed it.

You know what I mean?

Or like if it was some sort of like, or maybe it's something that went extinct.

It was some kind of.

Again, going back to the, going back to Lake Bacall, they have all these animals like only survive in that one area.

So what if they had these creatures, but maybe they were only two of them, you know, and then they went.

Yeah.

And people now, like you said, are just trying to fit into the story.

And it could, so I will say, in the Highlands, like it is very much, I mean, there is tourism, but it still feels natural.

There's single lane roads, very, the environment feels as little unchanged as could be.

So I'm like, it could maybe be hiding.

Okay, still.

All right, so final verdict, you are still completely undecided.

I guess, yeah.

I am gonna say no.

You don't believe in her at all.

You don't even believe she existed at one point?

Probably not.

I think you've just explained there's so many things that people could mistake.

And I think you're right.

It was like a folklore, and then people just kind of went with it.

And I'm sure if Kait were here, she would be saying, it's the aliens.

It's the portal.

And they're going through the portals.

And she would go on to some rant about the time-space continuum and the different timelines intersect and whatever.

But it was pretty, I highly recommend visiting, whether for The Monster or not.

Well, thank you for doing the research.

I think we got some good Loch Ness hunting videos for the Gram.

Oh yeah, get ready.

Yeah, this was great.

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What should the people do?

The people should send this video to three people named Mackenzie.

I only know one.

Or McDonald?

Or McDonald.

Which is actually Mack.

Yeah.

MackDonald, Mackenzie.

I have some, I am a descendant of some McDonalds.

Yeah.

I can say it's because they changed it.

Mack is the.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So anybody with the last name Mack.

How about anybody with like a Scottish?

Yeah.

Any Scottish heritage.

Send it their way.

Scroll on down, like, review, interact, give us a five star.

Yeah.

What else?

And that's it.

And we're going to see you next Tuesday.

Pretty excited for missing children.

We have a really interesting mystery next week.

So join us next Tuesday.

See you next Tuesday.

Bye.